Everything Glorious: And My Heart Skipped a Beat

We've had a lot going on lately some of which have challenged us spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Some may believe that this is TMI so it's a good thing that it doesn't bother me...well, it may if somebody says something to me, but as long as I don't hear it, I don't care!
Before I go to far for those who are interested in the meaning of the title, I'll explain it a little later.
It has been 11 or 12 weeks since our miscarriage. I had my first monthly visitor in February-how exciting right! We could start trying to concieve (TTC) again! So, after much waiting, I started testing in March 5 days before I should have started. Negative. First day of missed period-Negative. 3 Days after-Negative. 1 WEEK after-Negative. I am now going on 2 weeks when I should have started and its getting hard-really hard. Some days I feel like I am experiencing the miscarriage all over again. We (I) pray often for God to bless us with another child, but we have yet to hear a "Yes".
I thought that with as easy as it was to concieve Weston and the baby we lost, we would have no issues TTC with the next. I don't have answers to any of the Why's that have been popping up in my head. We just have to keep relying on God and trusting that his timing is perfect, his ways are perfect. We like to think we know best, but that just isn't true and sometimes that truth hurts.
There is another big decision that we are trusting God with. It has been an emotionally taxing process. Chad and I have been back and forth on this decision weighing the pro's and con's of it. I will share when the time is appropriate though, sorry about keeping you out in the cold!
Lastly for this post and the explanation of the title, I started babysitting 2 children yesterday. The little girl is 9 months old and the boy is 2 1/2 years old. I will be watching them every Tuesday for the next 8 weeks. I watch them at their house so it is easier on them. Anyway, yesterday went really well except for one incident-not involving their children but my own. I had Weston by his hand and the 9 month old on my hip. We were getting ready to go down stairs to the living room. I'm sure you've already figured out what happened next...Weston decides to pull his hand down and he tumbled ALL THE WAY DOWN the whole flight of stairs and landed on the linoleum at the bottom. Luckily he rolled down and didn't go head over heels. I uttered and explitive and shot down the stairs, but the baby down and picked up my thankfully wailing son. My heart stopped as I watched him in slow motion bumping, thumping and banging down the stairs. While in shock I check him over and called my mom. I was in tears as she walked me through what to check on him. What scared me most was that after he quit crying he started drifting off to sleep in my lap as he was sitting up right. Granted he was tired beforehand, but this was so terrifying. I checked on him often and thank God in Heaven he was ok. He doesn't even have a bruise or a bump. That was one of the worst and most emotionally exhausting moment in my life (after his birth of course :) )
so now to lighten the mood of this post, Weston got his first haircut and he now looks like a little boy now. He did not enjoy the haircut AT ALL. His daddy was the barber...